My Work in progress Showcase ~ Feedback wanted

Revelted · August 10, 2018, 4:42am

Hey guys, so I’m in the middle of creating a showcase, and I would love to see tome inside feedback from the many developers on this forum. Not only would this help my building drastically, but it may also give you guys some ideas !

Game link : Solidarity - Roblox

Thanks in advance!
~Revelted, Builder

korky5000 · August 10, 2018, 5:00am

Looks pretty good! I like the attention to small details throughout the map. I would suggest that you remove the low quality trash decals on the ground as they do not match the quality of the rest of the map. However this could be more of a personal preference on my part.

Look forward to seeing how this turns out!

Revelted · August 10, 2018, 5:25am

Yea i was kinda iffy on it, i might just re do it in actual parts, cause’ for the premises of the game , i want it to look like there’s a divide between the poor and the rich kinda deal

Fm_Trick · August 10, 2018, 7:09am

this is a VERY picky thing but… it would be nice if the sun rays would come from the actual position of the sun (fiddle with the GeographicLatitude property)

Lightlimn · August 10, 2018, 11:48am

This door is a little too big.

Otherwise, it’s pretty good. I agree with @korky5000 that the trash decals are not great. A lot of the particle images and decals on the floor don’t match in quality or style, so they should probably change.

Revelted · August 10, 2018, 5:24pm

@Fm_Trick I didn’t even know you could do that lmao thanks!

@Lightlimn yea i need to fix scaling on all the houses, and ill redo the trash in parts instead of decals

Revelted · August 10, 2018, 5:27pm

there

DysfunctionalBrick · August 14, 2018, 9:26pm

The leaves falling down from the tree are a bit odd, because they seem to just spead out like there are 5 different wind directions.
Try picking one direction, and slow down how fast they fall.

Even though the place is a bit dated, it has got a tree with leaves falling down as well. Try using that as an example.

DieSoft · August 15, 2018, 12:13am

Prepare for trouble, and make it double!

Since you ask for feedback I will be brutally honest with you. Don’t take what I have written below as something negative and I understand if some of the things I wrote might appear as me nit picking and just trying to push you down as an artist. This is not the case, I personally believe that if you are to learn, then you need to get straight feedback which is not wrapped up in kind words which might confuse you. So don’t take what I have written as something that should discourage you, we all learn new things and by helping each other we become better together. These points are my opinions and stuff that I have learned over the years I’ve been on Roblox as a builder. If you don’t agree with what I say then that is fine, but I took one very long look at your place and went pretty in depth. So hopefully you can learn something from this.

First of all, I don’t really understand where you want the design to go and at what level the detail should be at. The place is highly inconsistent, and feels more like a bunch of models that were made separately and then throw together. I will break down your entire place, tell you what you have done right and what you have done wrong then explain how you can improve or what you can add to make it better.

Cloth don’t behave like this in the real world. If the cloth is being stretched as it would be in the case of a wind shelter such as this, then the cloth would be straight and not have that strange thing poking out at the sides. Something that is worth to keep in mind when making objects of cloth that is meant to simulate protection against weather such as wind and rain, in the real world it is best to stretch the cloth and anchor it well. If the cloth is too loose then the wind will turn the wind shelter into a sail. As the winds come and go, it would cause vibrations and the objects used to anchor the cloth would come loose faster. When we are talking about rain, if the cloth isn’t stretched then pools of water will be created and that will cause leaks assuming that there is nowhere for the water to escape. This is overkill, yes, but if you keep things like these in mind then you will be able to excel beyond what others make because in the end we all try to relate to reality and things that we understand.

The structure of this wind shelter is extremely weak and it wouldn’t really serve as much protection against the wind as it would fall over.

The wind shelter use a ridiculous amount of wedges, I count at least 28 of them and that is way overkill. As you can tell, the material directions don’t align well. Consider going more simplistic on this as the cloth should be stretched as explained above. Another note is that the parts which is meant to anchor the corners of the cloth to the ground are hardly visible.

Your use of materials is something that needs work, as you can tell the WoodPlanks material here looks a bit strange since the material is flipped in the wrong direction. I would also say that using WoodPlanks for something like this isn’t the way to go since in real life one solid piece of wood will always be stronger than a bunch of small pieces of wood that are nailed together. So your choice to use “WoodPlanks” as a material for beams and sticks is an odd one. I advice that you use “Wood” for solid wooden objects.

Since materials pointing in the wrong direction seems to be a common issue in your builds, here is a plugin that allows you to flip the materials on whatever part you select. How it works is that it simply just rotated the object and resize it to look identical to what you had before, but instead flipped 90 degrees on its local axis. For this reason, material flip will not work on unions and meshparts.

The “Fabric” material is too detailed to be used for small detailed objects like these, consider trying out another material that is easier to see shape details such as plastic, smooth plastic or concrete.
Examples:

Consider making one large curve rather than a bunch of small ones.

Remove unnecessary detail, also consider choosing a different color for the rope than the cloth itself to make it stand out more.

The low resolution “trash” texture stands out quite a bit and feels really out of place. It is also super 2D unlike the objects around it and therefore doesn’t fit in. The grass itself is not textured and looks extremely bland against the slate material used for the ground and the rocks scattered across the map. Consider giving the plant the “Concrete” material or something similar to give more life to it.

This fence don’t really look good, and the simplicity of it doesn’t match the other models in the area.

The leaf particles are not the same color as the leaves on the tree and they just float away in odd directions. Consider making it so that they move down and spread for a more realistic look.

The tree design does not fit the stone brick wall as the brick wall is super smooth and curved, whereas the tree looks like as if it was hastily done by rotating cylinders without taking the sharp edges into account.
A way to combat this would be to curve the cylinders and keeping them at the same size similar to this.

Regarding the leaves being blocky, you could attempt to use spheres to create a more smooth look.

The inconsistency in part count and detail in your builds really shines when you make houses. The stone tiles that are used to create the fondation/bottom section of the wall is extremely sharp and uses a lot of parts which is not consistent with the middle section of the house. Since you use so many parts for the layered stone tiles and have rotated them slightly which cast shadows different on each surface, it feels really overwhelming to look at. It is as if it screams “Look at me, give me all your attention!”.

The same goes for the roof, although your choice of using the “Grass” material makes it difficult to spot the shapes and shadows cast by the parts shape. There are high detailed materials such as Grass, Fabric, Brick, Cobblestone, CorrodedMetal, DiamondPlate and Granite which shouldn’t be used for smaller objects or models which relies on creating a shape (such as the multi-layered grass). A solution to this would be to remove the multi-layered grass ontop or choose a different material.

It looks a bit strange that the roof isn’t being supported by wooden beams, so here is how I would go about to do it.

The scale is completely off from the previous models adding to the inconsistency.

Consider making the skull decal/texture slightly transparent to show the material of the sign, such as gaps and nails. I also advice not keeping it corrodedmetal, as the rust is pretty overwhelming (Roblox kind of messed up on that one).

There is a hole in the wall.

The terrain does not fit well with the models placed on it. You have made the terrain super sharp and blocky, and then tried to make things appear more realistic in other places which gives off some serious inconsistency vibes.

This sign is really messy.

The window is placed at a very odd place, as the mountain wall is really close to it and blocks the view.

Two different path designs that don’t flow together. Choose one, preferably the one on the left as the path on the right has the exact same problem as the layered stone tiles on the house, it is overkill and screams for attention.

As mentioned above, the path sticks out.

It is really easy to tell that you just copy and pasted this section, consider removing/rotating/scale/recolor some stone bricks to create a more natural less copy paste look.

The door is great (besides the material being flipped). It is however more detailed than the rest of the wall and thus sticks out a tiny bit, not much, but it does. Also, you have built individual planks, but choose to use the WoodPlank material which is a bit odd, consider using Wood instead.

It is really apparently that you just copy and pasted the building and did not take its shape into consideration.

Inconsitent, very… Veeeery inconsistent. The first level stone walls are 50 levels too high compared to the rest of the building.

The water particles are very non-water like. But I will say that making proper fountains can be pretty difficult and it requires a high particle rate to create a seamless flow or you can use beams and try something like a water fall. You can try and play around with this plugin for this

The overall design of the fountain isn’t bad, although you do have plenty of z-fighting in the tiny details.

I would advice trying to work with elevating the ground a little more, create slopes and related to give it a more 3D look.

The overall structure and use of wooden beams looks a bit strange, consider looking at images of medieval houses which were built using this design style.

And with that, I am done. If you want to see how I make things or learn how to create various shapes and stuff, then you can always check out my youtube building tutorials and skim through them if that is something that interest you. https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCTOEjTtJV_Hu_45pt-ksHDw/

Cheerio, hopefully this helped and I hope you don’t take what I have written negatively as that was not my intent.

Revelted · August 15, 2018, 5:51am

No way, you’re a top notch builder and I would expect nothing less from you! As i said before, it is still very incomplete and I will take in everything you said into consideration, although, some things I think I’ll find quite difficult, for I am not that experienced as a builder and also that I lack some imagination ( take the wood fences for example ) I think spheres would look a bit weird on the tree, and I lack the skill to create meshes or however else the people make trees with a bunch of realistic decals. The trash is a for sure thing that will be going and I need to figure out how I’ll adjust the houses to make them look good, I’ve been pondering on that for a while and I cannot come up with an idea that will block/make the houses flow easier, the only thing that comes up is that I should make another house that is similar, however it would need to be the same height and have the same ish details if they were to be connected, if they are not connected , I think I would find that a bit weird as well. As for the particles, I’m very new to using them q.q but thanks for the idea of beams! I never actually thought of that, and I’ll definitely take that into consideration! Also the inconsistent house >.< I knew that was coming for me I saw that while I was building and I realized that my studs were off which kinda made me angry, so I think I may need to redo that house. I have no Idea how I’ll redo the stone wall >.< i think i should just tear it down and rebuild a new one but again, I have a lack of imagination lol, and the terrain is a hard one too, I don’t really know if I should use the roblox terrain or not, but if not, I have no Idea how to make proper terrain using parts q.q, and finally for the elevation part, I don’t quite understand what you mean by that.

Overall thanks a bunch for the feedback as I try to become a stronger builder, I’ll try my best attempt at this considering this is my first showcase so I might as well make it to the best of my Current abilities

P.S. Thanks for the comment on the door, I think it looks pretty decent in my opinion as well lol

Revelted · August 15, 2018, 5:52am

Annnnndddd I got my first dislike on it… q.q

DieSoft · August 15, 2018, 6:35am

Regarding building houses, since this is a showcase I suggest that you custom build all houses for their own individual location and don’t cheap out by making one then copy and paste it around the map to save you time. A showcase is meant to look good, visuals over performance and function. You will always get a better looking result by tailoring a building to its location, rather than making one and duplicating it over and over.

And now onto terrain, you could always try to use this thing if you like triangle terrain, however I would advice that you don’t make such large gaps between the nodes in order to create a more detailed terrain.

If you want to create terrain like this guy then you simply just have to cut out a boulder looking union, then copy and paste it while rotating and expanding it. It is recommended however that you make a few for variation, then alter the color hue slightly to create a more realistic look.

If you want to create a more simple layer based terrain like I have done here for a game that I’m working on, then you will have to use wedges and SelectEdge which is a tool commonly found in all CmdUtl plugins, if you don’t have one then I advice that you go with our forked version called Studio Build Suite Studio Build Suite - Roblox

ignore my tree spam

I also have a slight hue change for each layer, to help separate them from each other. If you are curious about how I did the curved terrain then I used ResizeAlign to scale wedges to fit the corners which is something that I don’t think I have shown how you can do in any of my tutorial videos so I will have to make a quick video about that I think. Here is a recolored version to make it easier to see what I mean.

To make it easier for you to understand, I can record a quick gif series for you showing how I go about to do this stuff as well as provide a link to the ResizeAlign version that I use (it also comes with a fixed GapFill):

Step 1:
https://gyazo.com/cb7e0ddbb178aa265ec4688fee76627d
Step 2:

We need to get the exact coordinates for these corners here in order to properly fill every micro stud that might cause a gap. Using ResizeAlign, we can quickly and easily get the right size.

Step 3:
https://gyazo.com/407af6d9c85f7b8697438c3585a48e7f
https://gyazo.com/0036bcef9ee9f0c9f92574c4274446db

Always remember that when using ResizeAlign, it will be more difficult for the plugin to find the sloped face the more angled it is. To solve this you can scale it to be near flat and then select the sloped face with ease.
https://gyazo.com/6ce2f5f294434133d34f9fec6d8cf8e2

Step 4:
https://gyazo.com/8129910e9ceaf87977b43df67041eefa
This is the final part. If you want to learn how to create more shapes and stuff the most effective way then I advice that you watch this video that I made. It might appear basic on the surface, but knowing how to create these shapes and the problems you get when trying to make them and understanding how to overcome the problems will make it easier for you in the long run as you can apply these techniques for other builds.

If you want to get an idea about how I think when I design houses using my more known game design style, then you can watch this video. It is extremely long, a full 3 hours so unless you really can’t get enough of this old swede’s voice then I advice that you skip to the parts that interest you.

Here are all the lovely plugins I use when I build, if you feel adventurous then by all means, have a look at them and play around for a bit to figure out how they work: Inventory - Roblox

Also sorry for the dislike, whenever we go in-game a lot of younger users follow us and they don’t really understand the concept of showcases, since it lacked any gameplay or attraction for a person looking for an exciting game, chances are whoever disliked it simply didn’t understand. However, don’t let the like/dislike ratio bar affect you, when it comes to showcases especially, you will always get a bunch of random dislikes for the stated reason. That is just how it is.

Revelted · August 15, 2018, 6:41am

Alrighty! I’ll try my best ^^! Thanks again for this feedback, for I really do appreciate it, from someone who once owned roblox most prestigious building group that I’ve always dreamed of entering, I honestly wanna say thanks

DieSoft · August 15, 2018, 6:48am

No problem, we try to help people as much as we can when we can take the time. Feel free to DM me whenever if you have further questions. Although since I am off to Amsterdam for RDC and stuff tomorrow night I will be unavailable for the most part for a week. But I will reply whenever I get the chance.

Also good luck with getting in, you do need some practice that is for sure. But if you keep at it then you will learn quickly. Make sure to check out places by our other members and other well-known builders. @DysfunctionalBrick who replied to you earlier is a good example of a good builder that I recommend that you check out. From what I can remember his places does not contain a lot of terrain, but the buildings themselves and the way he goes about to design them is where he works his magic.

Revelted · August 15, 2018, 6:52am

Omg I didn’t even realize he commented O.o I’ve seen most (If not all) his public showcases and @DysfunctionalBrick has actually inspired some of my builds before.

Sorry for ignoring ya, I think I got caught up in diesoft’s comment

DieSoft · August 15, 2018, 7:07am

I stumbled across this thread as I was about to leave, it might be of interest to you.

My *Work in progress* Showcase ~ Feedback wanted

My Work in progress Showcase ~ Feedback wanted