Developers, our descriptions suck. People have stopped reading them because they suck. People have stopped writing them because they suck. Let’s fix that! Today, you’ll listen to me rant about game descriptions because you have nothing better to do. Each entry is dedicated to a specific problem. Let’s get started!
1. Your description isn’t descriptive.
You might roll your eyes, but some of you have done it, and you don’t even know it! A prominent issue in horror, mystery, and story games, developers are afraid to give too much away and end up with a description like this:
There’s a haunted house.
SpooOOooOoOOoky!1!1!!1!1! Congrats! You qualify for writing Netflix summaries. Jokes aside, what can you do to ameliorate this without throwing a textbook at players?
A. Haunted house could mean anything. Describe something unique about your haunted house—a recurring element your players won’t expect. Maybe the laws of physics change inside the house. Maybe the player built the house, but something’s been making changes, and they’re personal.
B. Imagery! Think back to English class. Don’t make a litany of everything in the house, but do show enough to give the reader a sense of what the house “feels like” before they decide to play. If the haunted television is important, describe it in detail.
C. Describe what the player will be doing in the game, but keep it as simple as possible. If it’s a minigame place, three of your best minigames should be enough. This doesn’t mean controls, which should generally come after your “actual” description.
2. Your description is too long.
Your players are here to play, not to read, but since you seem to be in the mood, you’ll want to improve your concision. I have a tutorial for this, and you should check it out! My preference? One paragraph, and make it short.
3. You’re relying on other games.
Your game should stand on its own.
My game is like [game X] and [game Y] with a twist!
What if I don’t know about games X and Y? What if I don’t like game X and game Y? What is the twist? Often, the problem here is that the game has no twist, and the developer is sprinkling the word into the description because they don’t realize this. That’s a game design issue, so we’ll ignore that case; imagine your game does have such a twist. Instead of calling it that, tell us what it is! Anglerfish don’t go, “Oh, fishies! I have a light!” They have a light, and they show it.
You’ll love this if you love that!
This is fine, but don’t let it be the opening statement, and certainly don’t let it be your only statement. Alone, this makes your game seem like a ripoff.
4. You put updates before the game.
Not much to say about this, but putting updates before your actual description will tickle the lazy bug in mouse-scrolling fingers.
5. You link to a description of your game.
Imagine if I made a separate post for each of these sections and linked to them here. Would you read them? Probably not! Of course, this is a tutorial, so I avoided reposting the concision spiel, but you get my point.
6. You use boring diction.
Word choice matters. You shouldn’t use overly technical or florid language unless you’re sure that’s the audience to which you’re speaking.
In [game name], it shall be your utmost onus to exit your phrontistery in great haste in order to declare your freedom from the inexorable paperwork bestowed upon you by your teacher in a manner that is most clandestine.
Eek.
By the way, make sure the diction you use matches the audience! If the words you use are harsh, make sure your game isn’t a comedy. If they’re relaxing, make sure your game isn’t a horror. Residence sounds formal, home sounds intimate, and house sounds generic. What’s best for your game?
7. You try to guilt the player into playing.
Please play my game! We only have one player per month and five billion dislikes! Please send help!
No.
8. You begin by asking for likes, favourites, and follows.
No sheep is going to like, favourite, or follow the sheep that claims jumping over a fence is fun without describing what a fence is beforehand; in fact, asking for these may be better suited to the actual game. Imagine if YouTubers began by asking for likes and subs.
9. You talk about the technical aspects of the game.
If you’re talking about the code, building, UI, and blah, blah, blah, the average player won’t know what you’re on about. You can phrase it differently, though—towering, fire-lit castles and vast, infested dungeons, for instance. It’s more specific, too!
10. And more.
I didn’t touch everything, because I don’t know everything! (I probably forgot stuff, too, you know.) If you have more to add, tell us! Finally, if you think your description might have a problem, ask someone you trust to give an honest opinion. Happy description writing!
now 
and 
earn 
money 
