Hello there, im xXSnowman_22Xx a 2 year builder and somewhat of a scripter on roblox. Iv’e recently been putting in some time to make a story game for roblox. I wanted to see what you guys thought about it, and if you would play it. Keep in mind it’s not done, i have a few pictures though!
DETAILS
Game name - : Pumpkin patch (STORY)
This game is about kids going on a a trip to a pumpkin patch, but what they don’t know is that it’s haunted.
Character’s
Billy (Manager of the pumpkin patch)
Grandma (Owns the cabin down the road that they go to)
Pumpkin minion (Works for the pumpkin master and kidnap’s the people i talked about up here ^^)
– IF YOU WANT TO READ ABOU IT –
– The kid’s arrive at the pumpkin patch, they greet billy and they go inside. A bad storm comes and knocks the power out in the house, billy goes to fix it in the shed and then he goes missing. The kids start to look for him and realize that he went to the shed they arrive at the shed to see blood everyone and a note that says “STAY OUT”. They look around for some more clues and find a trail that has some blood, they decide to go down it which takes them to the cabin where the Grandma is, a character knocks on the door and explains the situation they have. They have a camp fire, Grandma goes inside to get the cookies, BAM of thunder and she is gone. They lookd around for a little as it takes them to a cutscene where it has another letter that says “I told you to stay out! When will you ever learn…” They decide to stay the night and look for them in the morning. Morning arises, but it’s not really morning it’s still night time and someone had a bad dream, that someone else got kidnapped. They get back to searching for the Grandma and billy, Cricket noises start and its starts to sprinkle. They cross a bridge where up ahead is a creepy haunted graveyard. They are getting closer and closer they hear some noises in the bush. QUICK ITS THE PUMPKIN MINION, they have 60 seconds to get to the near by gave or else they die! They settle at the cave for the night, but first they need some wood to make a fire! They have 60 seconds to get the wood at the forest near by or else they cannot make a fire. When they arrive back they make a fire and almost are about to sleep but then the cave man arrives back at his tent, he’s not too happy that they are there… one character feels kind of shady about him so they decide before anything to get out of their. They continue their journey as they feel like they are getting closer and closer! Finally, they see a house almost like a old broken down house. Once character has a feeling that they could be in their (which they are). They arrive at the house, and realize that this is where they are staying and the minion and they master are too. They devise a plan and execute it! (I don’t want to say it you will have to find out once it’s released! ) – They save the manager billy, and the grandma!
a medium amount of realism and non-realism looks really bad, either make it fully real (add textures to the walls to make the house look realistic along with the grass) or make it non realistic, this seems like the work of an okayish game, I wouldn’t play this from the looks because whenever I see stuff like this I know the game might be confusing and they definitely end up being confusing
I wouldn’t play it not because it is bad but because pretty much every other story game is bad. If I was just browsing and saw this i would probably think something along the lines of “look another camping clone.”. Obviously your game isn’t a camping clone filled with stupid game-passes but I have played a lot of others causing me to think that. Point is you want to make it very obvious your game is original and has something i haven’t seen. Because something i should also mention is ive seen some story games that looked really cool and played them. I dont hate story games, I just am used to seeing low quality ones.
I would play this but as @QuackingDuckQuack said the font and colour of the signs are a little out of place, you might want to make then spookier Also the light around the yellow house is a little bright, you might want to make that slightly dimmer. Over all it’s a good idea and good game.
In my opinion, no I wouldn’t play it. This is because the game appearence dosen’t seem to fit in with the story. I mean, I can see you realism, that you’ve tried to make but, it dosen’t seem to fit together well for this one. Maybe add a bit more details, as the setting is pretty confusing, and might mislead players. Hope this helps, and good luck on your game!
Personally I love story games the only thing maybe try to find something other than blood to use so u can release the game on console (if u wait to release the game till near to hollowed it will do way better)
No not really, it seems like the whole plot of these story games is just: NPC tells you some stuff, you do a thing, wait a little bit, then something happens, investigate it, then run away and just not die, go back to a certain area repeat the same process and that’s just the whole game.
Yes, and no. You need to change some things. I would play this game if it has an original story, and isnt similar to other story games. Heres a list of things you can change,
The lighting engine, it doesnt fit the theme.
The surface gui text fonts.
The skybox, I recommend the plugin Atmos for high quality skyboxes.
If you want it to go from day and night, then use a dark/night skybox for nighttime, else use a fall themed skybox.
Finally the terrain, I recommend adding leafy grass and changing the grass color up a bit to make your game seem more unique.
Change atleast 3, or all of these things I pointed out. This will make your game more presentable, and more likely to be played by people.
I don’t play story games a ton anymore, but I do know they are pretty fun. However, your game lacks the actual story itself. 99% of story games include either a setting that is haunted or a killer in the story. If you want your story to be unique, add unique characters with emotion, and a very long interesting story.
Other than that your models looks nice, and what I assume is the lobby looks nice!
) – They save the manager billy, and the grandma!
Also the light around the yellow house is a little bright, you might want to make that slightly dimmer. Over all it’s a good idea and good game.