Hello! My name is Amazin and I’m taking criticism, feedback, and suggestions on a storyline for my game. There’s 4 islands and the story I’ve finished is Winds Map. Basically the main idea of the game is: you play music, sell your album for coins, and buy better instruments with the coins. Anyways, here’s the story I’m looking for feedback on: ML - Winds Map Story - Google Docs. I’ll be creating a storyline for each and every island.
so its kind of like a simulator between islands? or what?
also, i don’t understand why the music hypnotizes the citizens, like, does it have magic or something? also why music? why not something else.
Another thing, your game has too much dialogue, i mean, thats fine, but i would rather have some sounds to go along with it, like entry point has no voice acting, but you can see a question mark, or exclamation mark on their head.
you should also make it more fun to get the uniform, like steal it from a guard (like EP, again), as getting it from a closet is just too easy. Maybe you have to find the closet?
what IS the black object anyways?
also, music notes for the flute, recorder, piano, organ, and stuff like that are all very similar.
still, i dont understand the talking music note or why its music anyway. why not a secret scientific weapon or something?
you also don’t have a good explanation why team corrupted is corrupted, they simply are.
your simulator story is pretty unique and nice though, just needs some brushing up.
Hey there! Great story seriously! I don’t know if you are hiring anyone but I’d like to help you if you ever need help with modeling/the building part of the game! Anyways, if not, I hope your game reaches the Front Page because it has potential!